I faced a dilemma this week, and I want your opinion. But it’s of a personal nature, and so if you’d prefer not to read it, I’ve hidden it below the fold. Hit “more” if you want to read, and give feedback if you wish. Especially as this is kind of a “blog-friends” only blog now, rather than for public display.A month ago, I lent Alderney my laptop. She didn’t have a computer, and had just bought an mp3 player so wanted to put her music onto it, so I lent her the laptop. It hadn’t seen regular use since the opening months of 2004, so it’s not like I was going to miss it. Before taking it to her, I backed up important files, and cleared out some of the rubbish.
Wednesday though, while at lunch, Alderney told me she’d been reading files and emails that were on the laptop, and took me to task for the way I treated a girl I’d gone out with in the early weeks of 2004. The chat logs chronicled the history of the short period we’d dated, and Alderney said I treated Kay not very well.
That she’d been reading them made me feel uncomfortable, but I figured that it’d just blow over, I’d forget about it, and it wouldn’t be an issue. But for the rest of the day, it bothered me more and more. I was quite offended by it. But I thought that maybe normal people don’t think that much of it, maybe it’s just that I’m a bit of a geek, and not everyone would think it was wrong. So maybe I should just forget about it?
Because I wasn’t sure, I checked with some of my friends, geek and non-geek, about what the societal standards were with this. It’d been an issue between Alderney and I before, that we have differing standards as to what is rude behaviour, and so I needed to check if I was being totally weird about this, or whether a “normal” person would be upset by it.
I was shocked with the response I got.
So if a partner went through your emails, or chat-logs, or text messages, would you be okay or uncomfortable with it?